To all of my friends have a great and safe New Year's. I have had a fantastic year with all of my friends as well as meeting new ones. I look forward to a fantastic 2005. I'm sure I will have some wild adventures with the friends that I have some stories to tell with the new ones I make. I promise that in 2005 I will write more. I swear I will.
Ta ta for now and bring on the booze cuz it's time to "party".
Friday, December 31, 2004
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
Spam and Spyware
My 2 biggest computer pet peeves.
First, spam. Hello did someone out there tell these people that I needed bigger boobs? I mean what is wrong w/ my rack? Wait I know. I"M not suppose to have a farking rack. Why the fark do I need a boob job? Come on now. How attractive would I be if I had a set of huge tatas and a penis. Nope sorry don't think so. I don't think I need to double my pleasure w/ boobs and a penis. Also, why is it that spammers think women need penis enlargements? Don't they need the penis first? And why would I want a woman 1) who has a penis and 2) has one that is bigger then me. Oh the humanity. I hope the person who started spam ends up with both boobs and a penis. Then maybe that person could get them both enlarged and get off me about mine.
Next farking spyware. Get your piece of shiat software off of my system. If I wanted someone or something to follow me I would get a dog or one of those boob jobs mentioned above. I wished I could find out who came up with this idea. If I did I would grab a few buddies and we would camp out on that person's lawn. Then party it up and follow the person around when they leave. Why not? That is what they are doing to me over the internet? And the makers of blazefind fark off you cacksuckers. Assholes crashed my system for 2 days. Not only was it bad to have to fix the damn thing, but then to hear about it from a nagging wife. I spit on you farktards. Peteewy.
First, spam. Hello did someone out there tell these people that I needed bigger boobs? I mean what is wrong w/ my rack? Wait I know. I"M not suppose to have a farking rack. Why the fark do I need a boob job? Come on now. How attractive would I be if I had a set of huge tatas and a penis. Nope sorry don't think so. I don't think I need to double my pleasure w/ boobs and a penis. Also, why is it that spammers think women need penis enlargements? Don't they need the penis first? And why would I want a woman 1) who has a penis and 2) has one that is bigger then me. Oh the humanity. I hope the person who started spam ends up with both boobs and a penis. Then maybe that person could get them both enlarged and get off me about mine.
Next farking spyware. Get your piece of shiat software off of my system. If I wanted someone or something to follow me I would get a dog or one of those boob jobs mentioned above. I wished I could find out who came up with this idea. If I did I would grab a few buddies and we would camp out on that person's lawn. Then party it up and follow the person around when they leave. Why not? That is what they are doing to me over the internet? And the makers of blazefind fark off you cacksuckers. Assholes crashed my system for 2 days. Not only was it bad to have to fix the damn thing, but then to hear about it from a nagging wife. I spit on you farktards. Peteewy.
Friday, November 05, 2004
Life Sux Today
Now I'm not normally down, but this week has totally sucked azz. I duuno why either. Well I do know why, but I'm not sure what to do about it. Ah the humanity. I need a vacation from life. Anyone want to go with? Should life really suck this bad? I mean I'm a pretty good person. I believe I'm fun to be around, handle my responsibilities, work well with others, and am pretty laid back. But why is it that others have toF things up? Well today I'm going to say fuck it. I will play ball tonight and then proceed to drink beer or jack and coke. I guess if life sucks ass it can't get worse with drinks. Right?
Monday, November 01, 2004
CL
Much thanks to the Queen of Blogs, CL. Thanks for the invite to the party. The place looked great and the drinks were perfect. Also, thanks for setting me up with your friends. Always looking to entertain others. Glad to know that your sis and man will never remeber my name. I hope there are no blackmail pix of me. Again thanks for the fun. The infamous single/double fisted Shaggy.
Thursday, October 28, 2004
Feelin' a Lil Hostile today
At work we have a policy that allows you to bring dogs to the work place as long as they are on leashes. In my building there is this lady that brings in her dog everyday and just let's him roam free. I don't know how many times I have made comments out load regarding the dog being on a leash or at least with his damn owner. SO, today with most of management out on some lil' charity crusade, this chick thinks that her dog owns this place. F'ing thing is running around like this is a NASCAR course. Then I went into my printer room and found a nice pile of dog spew. So, I said that is the last straw. Shiatty thing is I love dogs, but that was it. So, I called HR and let them know. Now I have someone on the war path against me. Life is great. Fher and her rat dog. Get a man and get laid. Your dog is not your f'ing child.
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
Classic Movie Quotes
I was just cruising the net, while watching the World Series game, and came across a site with movie quotes. Man there are so many out there, but as I was reading them I was busting up laughing. Some from the classics such as .... "Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder." "Who's scruffy-looking?" Let's see if peeps can name the movie these lines come from and see if I can name them years from now. Starting off easy....
"Whoa. Whoa. Why the F-ing? Why in front of the kid? All ya gotta do is say "earmuffs" to him, and you can say "Fuck, shit, bitch." ok that was easy, but funny.
"Oh, Marcus. What are you trying to do, scare me? You sound like my mother. We've known each other for a long time. I don't believe in magic, a lot of superstitious hocus pocus. I'm going after a find of incredible historical significance, you're talking about the boogie man. Besides, you know what a cautious fellow I am." Had to get that one in. It has my name.
"I want this guy dead! I want his family dead! I want his house burned to the ground! I want to go there in the middle of the night and piss on his ashes!"
"Gee, thanks, Dave. Bang-up job so far. Extortion, coercion. You'll pardon me if I ask you to kiss my pucker. The same fuckers that rounded us up and sank us into this mess are telling me They'll bail me out? Fuck you."
"You wanna get high man?"
"Does Howdy Doody got wooden Balls man?"
"That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."
"Hey, little anal-dwelling butt monkey. Time for you to go home, little buddy."
"The 1961 Ferrari 250GT California. Less than a hundred were made. My father spent three years restoring this car. It is his love, it is his passion. "
"It is his fault he didn't lock the garage."
The quote of all quotes and this is why I am a baseball freakin' nut ....
"Ray, people will come Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won't mind if you look around, you'll say. It's only $20 per person. They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come."
Ok World Series game is over. Damn Cards can't they score any runs? Maybe they need a midget in their locker room.
"Whoa. Whoa. Why the F-ing? Why in front of the kid? All ya gotta do is say "earmuffs" to him, and you can say "Fuck, shit, bitch." ok that was easy, but funny.
"Oh, Marcus. What are you trying to do, scare me? You sound like my mother. We've known each other for a long time. I don't believe in magic, a lot of superstitious hocus pocus. I'm going after a find of incredible historical significance, you're talking about the boogie man. Besides, you know what a cautious fellow I am." Had to get that one in. It has my name.
"I want this guy dead! I want his family dead! I want his house burned to the ground! I want to go there in the middle of the night and piss on his ashes!"
"Gee, thanks, Dave. Bang-up job so far. Extortion, coercion. You'll pardon me if I ask you to kiss my pucker. The same fuckers that rounded us up and sank us into this mess are telling me They'll bail me out? Fuck you."
"You wanna get high man?"
"Does Howdy Doody got wooden Balls man?"
"That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."
"Hey, little anal-dwelling butt monkey. Time for you to go home, little buddy."
"The 1961 Ferrari 250GT California. Less than a hundred were made. My father spent three years restoring this car. It is his love, it is his passion. "
"It is his fault he didn't lock the garage."
The quote of all quotes and this is why I am a baseball freakin' nut ....
"Ray, people will come Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won't mind if you look around, you'll say. It's only $20 per person. They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come."
Ok World Series game is over. Damn Cards can't they score any runs? Maybe they need a midget in their locker room.
Thursday, October 21, 2004
Queen of Blogs
To the great Cindy-Lou here is a blog dedicated to you. To the person who did her wrong and made her have to leave a hatefull post... I spit on thee. Don't mess with the Queen of Blogs. Cindy-Lou has a great following due to her writing skills, sense of humor, and the fact that she doesn't have any probs speaking her mind. Cindy-Lou don't let the lil people get you upset. We, your followers, will get your back. Cindy-Lou thanks for the entertainment you have given myself with all the good reading and laughs. Just remember 1 thing, if someone pisses you off grab the SILVER BULLET and let lifes lil worries just go away and all will be good again. Unless you have too many and a hangover sets in in the morning. Long live Cindy-Lou, Queen of Blog.
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
West Coast Morons
Now only to be PC here I would have to say something about west coast people.
Being in the hurricane was interesting. You could tell that my roomate and myself had neither been through one before or we were drunk. It was a combination of the 2. When the high winds hit we just walked outside in the middle of the rain and winds and started daring each other to do things. Taking soap outside and taking a shower in the rain and wind. Playing horseshoes at the beginning of the storm. Breaking the security tape so we could get into the resorts pools and hot tubs. All of this while dogging debrit and security. Then this city of Orlando had a curfew that lastest over 12 hours. Talk about cabin fever. But we made the best of it. One of our teamates showed up and the 3 of drank about 60 beers during the hurricane.
Locals were stocking up on water and necessities and we stocked up on alcohol, top ramen, and canned goods. Course with the canned goods we forgot that you couldn't cook them if the electricity went off. Mionor detail. Over looked though due to the left over pizza and beer we had. Great times and memories of Hurrcane Jeanne.
Being in the hurricane was interesting. You could tell that my roomate and myself had neither been through one before or we were drunk. It was a combination of the 2. When the high winds hit we just walked outside in the middle of the rain and winds and started daring each other to do things. Taking soap outside and taking a shower in the rain and wind. Playing horseshoes at the beginning of the storm. Breaking the security tape so we could get into the resorts pools and hot tubs. All of this while dogging debrit and security. Then this city of Orlando had a curfew that lastest over 12 hours. Talk about cabin fever. But we made the best of it. One of our teamates showed up and the 3 of drank about 60 beers during the hurricane.
Locals were stocking up on water and necessities and we stocked up on alcohol, top ramen, and canned goods. Course with the canned goods we forgot that you couldn't cook them if the electricity went off. Mionor detail. Over looked though due to the left over pizza and beer we had. Great times and memories of Hurrcane Jeanne.
East Coast Morons
Ok so this last weekend I was in Florida for the USSSA C Division Worlds and there just happend to be a hurricane that goes through the state. The people there were way off their rockers. I had a couple of conversaions with some of the locals there and they just blew me away. They would usually start out the same way just normal chit chat about the hurricane and what they were doing to get prepared. Then I would make a comment saying that I was glad that I lived in California and only had to deal with an earthquake once out of 10 years. And these people would flip out. They would no way could they go through an earthquake and how they scared them. Let me see 4 hurricanes in the last month 0 earthquakes and they are scared of earthquakes.
Funny thing is I used to live in Fl for a few years and never went through a hurricane. then I show up for the biggest softball tourney of the year and there is a hurricane.
Funny thing is I used to live in Fl for a few years and never went through a hurricane. then I show up for the biggest softball tourney of the year and there is a hurricane.
Thursday, August 26, 2004
You Know & Fuget 'Bout It
Fuget Bout It:
Morning breath
Broken Promises
The dreaded "I have a headache."
Lame ass drivers
People who can dish trash, but not receive it
Budweiser and Tequila
Fake boobs
People who think their shit don't stink
Dry heat
Dishes
Warm bed
Parents who let their kids run wild in public
Not being in control of a moving vehicle
Giving a massage and not receiving one in return
Excess clothes
You Know:
Smell of fresh cut grass
100 ft. below w/ a tank of air on my back
Crack of the bat
Sand between my toes
The #13
Spontaneous sex
Cool as the other side of the pillow
Great friends
BBQ
Guiness, Jack and Coke, Silver Bullet
A week naked in Jamaica
Sites and sounds of the ocean
My lil' one waking me up and looking into her deep blue eyes
Children and their enthusiasm
Popcorn
Cold pizza and beer breakfasts
Morning breath
Broken Promises
The dreaded "I have a headache."
Lame ass drivers
People who can dish trash, but not receive it
Budweiser and Tequila
Fake boobs
People who think their shit don't stink
Dry heat
Dishes
Warm bed
Parents who let their kids run wild in public
Not being in control of a moving vehicle
Giving a massage and not receiving one in return
Excess clothes
You Know:
Smell of fresh cut grass
100 ft. below w/ a tank of air on my back
Crack of the bat
Sand between my toes
The #13
Spontaneous sex
Cool as the other side of the pillow
Great friends
BBQ
Guiness, Jack and Coke, Silver Bullet
A week naked in Jamaica
Sites and sounds of the ocean
My lil' one waking me up and looking into her deep blue eyes
Children and their enthusiasm
Popcorn
Cold pizza and beer breakfasts
Monday, August 23, 2004
F'd No Matter What I Do
Why is it that if I come home after a long day of work and sit on my ass grab a beer and watch a lil' tv that I get yelled at? Especially, for stupid shiat, like play with the kids, who are on my lap, or cook dinner or help cleanup the house. Then when I ask for a lil' down time to realx a sec I get chewed out. I mean shit give me a few secs. It's not like the house is going to fall apart or that nobody is going to starve. Is a half hour too much to ask for? Then when I do come home from work and start to do these things that the previous day I was getting yelled I get yelled at again. What the f? How do I win or at least get a tie? Today I have a rough day at work and when I get home, after grabbing a couple of beers, I start to finish a couple of projects that I need to get done and I get chewed out for not hanging out with the fam. Sheesh. Hell tomorrow I am coming home with ear plugs in my ears or I am just going to head to the bar. I think the bar will win or maybe a 12 pack and ear plugs. Either way I am not going to hear myself get chewed out for no f'ing reason. :-)
Friday, August 20, 2004
Olympic Power Walking???
What the hell is Olympic power walikng and what is it doing on my tv? What moron at NBC decided "Hey let's put power walking on our tv schedule."? You have to be kidding me. Olympic power walking. Why not have Olympic marbles or Olympic grass growing? This has to be the lamest sport ever or can it even be considered a sport? I would think that the programmers would have some sort of a clue that nobody cares about power walking. I stayed up late to watch something other then swimming or gymnastics and I get this. What a joke. I am thinking that this weekend I am going to load up the cooler (Coors Light of course) ho pin the truck and head off to my local high school track (Blackford) setup the lounge chair and watch people walk the track. If I am feeling lazy maybe I will just set this up in my front yard. Then as people walk by I will cheer them on and offer them water with the theme of Rocky blairing in the background. Although this sounds funny this is not going to happen. So, why would I even want to watch this on tv. Is this the best that NBC can do for the die hard olympic fans that are stayin gup late to actually watch them. Gee thanks for nothing.
Enough of my ranting and raving. it's not like NBC is actually going to put something on intersting anyways. Good luck to the US Olympians and congrats to the winners.
Enough of my ranting and raving. it's not like NBC is actually going to put something on intersting anyways. Good luck to the US Olympians and congrats to the winners.
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Olympics
Ok I guess it is time to write about something, so today's topic is the Olympics. I just watched the first American male get the individual GOLD in gymnastics and I got chills. Seriously, hairs stoodup on my arms. Now here is the shitty part. I knew that he won earlier today. It sooooo sux having the olympics get played out 10 hours earlier then it is being shown. The way technology and the news are today you can't help it. Unless you live in a bubble you hear about the golds, silvers, and bronzes. The outstanding achievements some and the devistating defeats by many others.
The Olympics are what sports are all you about. It's just you, by yourself or with teamates, against the world. It's just no the same though having to watch the whole Olympics tape delayed. Maybe I am a little selfish, but the way Greece is losing money why not have the summer Olympics in the western hemisphere. We are the largest tv market in the world. We love sports and prove it the way people keep paying for tickets to games, even though every year they complain about the price hickes. COme on I heard yesterday that there were 3,000 people at a soccer game. 3,000 you have to be kidding me. That is pathetic. Guaranteed if that game was here there would at least be 10,000 fans there.
Where to begin with men's basketball. Who can we go to next? I mean shit we brought in the pros when the college kids got beat, but now the pros suck. If I wanted to see a game of ghetto basketball I would go to the ghetto. Basketball is all about "ME" and screw the team. Gone of the days of, heaven forbid, passing the ball or making an outside shot. To get beat by Puerto Rico by 19 is horrible. Show a little hear t and learn to play as a team. Unfortunately, that doesn't get them sponsors. These Euopean team have skills and play great as a team. Not the US. We have great players, but no team.
Well enough of the Olympics for now. A big Go USA. Good luck to the athletes. Bring home the medals.
The Olympics are what sports are all you about. It's just you, by yourself or with teamates, against the world. It's just no the same though having to watch the whole Olympics tape delayed. Maybe I am a little selfish, but the way Greece is losing money why not have the summer Olympics in the western hemisphere. We are the largest tv market in the world. We love sports and prove it the way people keep paying for tickets to games, even though every year they complain about the price hickes. COme on I heard yesterday that there were 3,000 people at a soccer game. 3,000 you have to be kidding me. That is pathetic. Guaranteed if that game was here there would at least be 10,000 fans there.
Where to begin with men's basketball. Who can we go to next? I mean shit we brought in the pros when the college kids got beat, but now the pros suck. If I wanted to see a game of ghetto basketball I would go to the ghetto. Basketball is all about "ME" and screw the team. Gone of the days of, heaven forbid, passing the ball or making an outside shot. To get beat by Puerto Rico by 19 is horrible. Show a little hear t and learn to play as a team. Unfortunately, that doesn't get them sponsors. These Euopean team have skills and play great as a team. Not the US. We have great players, but no team.
Well enough of the Olympics for now. A big Go USA. Good luck to the athletes. Bring home the medals.
Friday, August 06, 2004
Why am I an F'ing Idiot
F'ing idiot 1-- Ok so last night, while bored out of my mind and insomnia kicking in, I decided to join an online poker website. With credit card in hand I sign up and place $25 into my account. I find a poker room that is $.25 no limit hold 'em and jump on in. At first I started out a lil' tentative, but then after a few hands the cards started going my way. THe table started out with 8 people, but there was two of us that really started running things. He would get somebody to go all in and then I would get someone all in. After about 2 hours of playing this other person and myself ran at least 15 people off of the table and had bank rolls of about $500+. Then him and I go at it, only cuz there was no one left in the room. Finally, after about 8 hands I got him to go all in and won. Now I have a good chunk of change. Now the shitty part. I finally get up and leave the poker room and go to cash out. When I get to the f'ing cashier I find out that I was playing with funny money and not real money. After about 5 minutes of pissing and moaning I finally just shutoff my computer in discust. All in all $900= down the drain
F'ing idiot number 2-- Ok I finished writing this whole rant about last night and hit the damn spell check button and the damn thing gets erased. I need the weekend to get here quick. No fam home this weekend and I am going to drink BEER. Nectur of the gods.
F'ing idiot number 2-- Ok I finished writing this whole rant about last night and hit the damn spell check button and the damn thing gets erased. I need the weekend to get here quick. No fam home this weekend and I am going to drink BEER. Nectur of the gods.
Tuesday, July 27, 2004
Sunday, July 18, 2004
Kids
Sometimes I wonder what some parents do to raise their kids. My neighbors had a bunch of kids over for a slumber party and I could not believe how some of these kids behaved. Now I'm not saying that my kids are the best (they are), but the attitudes and manners of some kids are amazing. They had no manners or were bossy towards others and then complained about not getting their way. Do these parents just let their kids run the house? I know at mine that is not the case. Have parents forgoten about dicipline or are they scared about what others will say? The way I see it is like this, a spanking worked for my grandfather on his kids and it worked for my dad on his two. Heck I have the belt, that my grandfather used on his kids and then my dad used on us, hanging in my garage. Kids don't deserve a beating, but if mine do something that they know is wrong a smack on the hand is a good reminder not to do that again.
Monday, July 12, 2004
Life with Automatic Begins
Well started playing softball this weekend with Team Auto. To say that I was pressing would be a huge under statement. The guys on the team kept reassuring me that I had nothing to worry about. Still, starting with a new team, in an NIT, batting lead-off, and playing the 5 man I was a little uneasy. I know they know I can play the game and I look forward to proving myself to these guys over the next few months. We have a good team and should make some serious noise.
Funny though the difference between this team and the last team is night and day. With this team you know everyone is going to be there and ready to play. It is nice to show up early before a tourney and take some bp and then a few ground balls. Boy do I need to take infield practice. Not the fact tat I don't know where to go, but just the repetition of taking ground balls. After playing the outfield for so long with spot opportunities in the infield I am a little rusty. Over time and practice though that will change.
All in all first tourney and I made it to Sunday. Been a while since I have made it to a Sunday. Team record for the weekend was 3-2. Not bad, but if we hit we are definitely not 3-2. Should be a fun next 3 months.
Funny though the difference between this team and the last team is night and day. With this team you know everyone is going to be there and ready to play. It is nice to show up early before a tourney and take some bp and then a few ground balls. Boy do I need to take infield practice. Not the fact tat I don't know where to go, but just the repetition of taking ground balls. After playing the outfield for so long with spot opportunities in the infield I am a little rusty. Over time and practice though that will change.
All in all first tourney and I made it to Sunday. Been a while since I have made it to a Sunday. Team record for the weekend was 3-2. Not bad, but if we hit we are definitely not 3-2. Should be a fun next 3 months.
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